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MacSteed | Assuming you wanted to change your life, how far back in time would you have to go to fix it? |
I should explain. This isn't the standard "time machine" question, in that you are restricted to the confines of your own lifetime. So what I'm asking you to consider is some sort of turning point in your life after which things changed for the worse. If you were given the opportunity to go back and relive your life from a fixed point in time (presumably just prior to making a terrible mistake or a fatal decision or suffering some horrible accident, whatever it may be), how far back would you need to go? Would a year or two do it? Would have to go back to your childhood? Or would you want to start fresh and go all the way back to the womb? Think about it and share whatever you feel comfortable sharing, because your reasons for wanting to go back and the changes you would like to make are the most revealing components of your answer.
(Note: I'm placing this under the dread "Other" category but I'm thinking we could really use a category for the Supernatural.)
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Thank you for the thoughtful responses, particularly those of you willing to share deeply personal issues in your lives... joshandashleydorn, it takes a lot of courage to even be able to face what happened to you, let alone to discuss it with others. Please don't be hard on yourself. You were the victim, after all... want2bnparadise, the passage of time has clearly given you perspective. It's great to have a support system. I'm glad you came through it all intact... keenu, it's hard to know just how far back one would need to go, isn't it? ... hope, I likely didn't explain my premise well enough. The idea was that by going back to a certain point you would NOT have to relive something terrible. Obviously, this wouldn't be possible in every case because some things are completely out of our control... sage, yours was as touching a story as any I've read here. I find myself frustrated by the fact you didn't know not to suggest you were doing anything but visiting... (more) |
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sagebella
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Ahhh, the "rewind/erase" button of life that we sometimes long for.... what if?
I determined for myself long ago, that I didn't want to look back on my life and have regrets.. That if something of an unfortunate nature happened, I would simply regard it as a learning experience, and take what was good from the occurance and leave the rest behind.
A question like this - the mind can't help but look back and do a self-examination. Would I continue to live as I have lived and leave well enough alone, because who knows what changes to my life would result because of this one change. Still the possibilities boggle the mind...
Of the terribly tragic events of my life that I won't, really CAN'T reveal ( I admire others' bravery to bare their souls unflinchingly - the unintended but evitable judgement is more than my tender heart can take, I've made my peace of sorts with it and I'll bear them alone, thanks.) The one thing I can almost laugh about and cry about at the same time, is the wrecking of my life dream to travel the world as a working global citizen. My plan was to start in England, because the languages are similiar enough (really we don't speak the SAME English folks) and from there I would make connections that took me on a global explore of sorts, there would be adventure good and bad, and times would I'd miss the good old USA like a spike through the heart, but it was going to be a rich life - a life of my own intention... ah it's still painful to look upon 8 yrs later.
What happened? Got deported. Was honest and said I would be working while in country, COULD have said I was just there on "holiday" (they don't say vacation as much as we do) and I would very likely not be on Answers tonight.
So for me it boils down to one short phrase, "Just here on holiday."
Was in merry old England for all of 13 hours.
One thing that has eased the pain, is hearing from my nephew's lips (not the one I'm pictured with at 360, but the older one) " I know why you came back Aunt Jenny." You do? " I needed you, that's why God brought you back."
This of course made me cry on the spot, but they were tears of joy. That kid, those boys, would give my life twice for them and die both times smiling. |
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2/23/03 or 10/14/05 would be the days I would most want to change. I really couldn't choose between them. In both cases, people I care for greatly could have been saved. |
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hope_help
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After deep contemplation, I realize I wouldn't go back at all.
Though the desire to tell my father, "I love you, too"!
Plus knowing I could hold my mother's hand and keep her from being alone as she left this world or have one last talk with my 'very best friend' before he died, all would mean so much to me, but the fear of probablity to reliving it all without the knowledge to 'do it differently' and end up reliving it the same as the first time with all the same pain, is more than my mind can bare and believe it all worthwhile!
I believe my going back could not stop my loved ones dying because it was their destine time to leave. All it could do is re-enact 'great pain and suffering'. and though my destiny said I must live through it once, I can not see choosing to live it twice!
I also fear if I made the choice to go back, I may alter my family's lives and change the meeting of my 'in-law-children' and I lose them, my grandchildren and other loved ones that are in my life now.
So Thanks, but No Thanks! |
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patzky99
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there is nothing i would want to change mac. even my bad (ok... "NOT SO HOT") choices in life have all gone into the making of who i am today... and overall i'm pretty durned happy with me. nothing has been thrown my way which i couldn't overcome... maybe i've just been a little bit lucky or sheltered... but there's nothing i would 'fix'.
also, i just wanted to echo smellyfoot's concern... there is a dark theme that seems to be lurking behind that armor... i hope all's well. |
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reneedcarter
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ten years. I was in college. I would have chosen a solid career path and stuck to it. I would have cared less about what other people thought of me......and I would have ended my codependent relationship in the year that it started. I would have been stronger about my relationship choices and I would have made school my main priority.
This is using the 'if I could go back "knowing what I know now"' principle. I dont know how that would work out though cause all of that hardship has made me who I am today and I wouldnt want to give any part of me up. Would life be better for me now? maybe. Would I be as strong? maybe not. |
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Keenu
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As I thought about your question I kept going back further and further in time! (you should know that I believe that one's complete life can be changed from the powerful present moment and that we should have no regrets about anything that we have done but for the sake of answering your question I will suspend that belief)
At first it was 1980 but now I will have to answer 1st grade. I was extremely shy when I was young and very scared, I was very unsure of myself. I would go back and become outgoing and unafraid.
I believe that this building of my self esteem at an early age would have helped eliminate my acceptance of some very bad relationships. |
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gsi
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15 years |
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sabortooth_13
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about 2 years ago |
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smellyfoot â„¢
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The content of your questions lately is making me concerned...is everything OK MacStead? Is there something you'd like to talk about? As of yet, in my 23 years I don't have a moment when things "changed for the worse". In fact, when terrible things happen in my life, I try my hardest to make the best of it, and continue on an upward slant. So, I don't really have an answer...but what is yours??? |
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wuzzie
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About 3 years. Wouldn't have let her go just like that ;) |
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dransom90
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I would have to go back probably three or four years. |
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Mr.Anonymous
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Id like to go back and stop mylsef from meeting a horribly evil man, one who f'd me up for the rest of my life. But unless I retained my future knowledge I wouldnt know how evil he was. |
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joshandashleydorn
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Good question, will make some people think. For me I knew the answer right away. I was molested as a child and kept this a secret until I was an adult when I finally told my parents. I would go back to the first time the incident happened, if I couldn't prevent it (I'm assuming I couldn't because of my young age) I would have told immediately. The pain, anger, and disappointment I've had in my life would not have been so monsterous had I told immediately and let my parents do their job to help me. Instead I waited for almost 15 years keeping this ugly secret inside me and hiding a situation that should have been told to my parents all because my attacker was a terrific manipulater. I am totally convinced that I am the product today of the person of yesterday which includes the event of being molested and I often wonder how I would be different if I had told after that first time instead of letting it go on for years and then letting the hatred and fear fester inside me. |
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dragonberry_huckefly
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hmmm, that's an interesting question. I know I would have to go back to my childhood, but I don't know if there was a specific turning point or not, I think it was just my whole childhood in general. If I knew then what I know now...blahblahblah. I would have figured out a way to get out of my house, go live wiht my dad, or my grandparents, or anybody else. I would have had enough confidence in myself to ask for the help I knew i needed! |
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Want2BNParadise
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I would go back eight years this would be the time I became addicted to prescription pills and hurt my husband and children.It took me going into a rehab to get clean which in my opinion was the greatest act of love my husband could have ever done for me. |
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man_in_310*123456>>
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I would go back to a period when life was more simple. Infact i will be strting over now and i will let you know the results. |
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peternal
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Just prior to my conception... |
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lau
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Maybe a year, I would have act completely different.
I F**** it up...royalty. |
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Rij
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as long as i need to |
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Thermo
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Do you believe I am happy enough?
I do not feel the need. |
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super girl
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I wouldn't change a thing! I think I've learned alot from my past and some bad and some good. Be greatful for what you have and strive for what you want. |
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