jezebelring
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it's pretty hard to know what the problem is, based on the vagueness of your question. my first reaction is that you've lost touch with your son, which means you've gotten out of the habit of talking to him in a conversational way. and exactly what are you looking for in saying "normal"? does that mean he's not what you want him to be? because most kids won't be at various times.
pre-teens are, as a part of normal growing up, becoming more independent and trying on different personas in order to find out where they fit in the world. it is perfectly normal for that to be pretty baffling for adult observers. the main thing is to stay (become?) accessible and loving (no matter what). if your child is a stranger to you, you've got some serious work to do. (and it ought to be a Big Priority.) |
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*baby elmo*
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I AM 15
MY MAMA THINKS THE SAME WAY ABOUT ME. I HEAR HER TALKING ABOUT ME IN THE PHONE WITH HER FRIENDS N I HATE IT.
IT'S NORMAL
TRUST ME!
HAS UR SON EVER TRIED TALKING 2 U IF YES LISTON CUZ IT IS INPORTANT 2!CUZ I TRY TALKING 2 MY MAMA BUT SHE SOMETIMES GETS MAD! HES NORMAL!
DON'T WORRY! TRY 2 TALK 2 HIM IF HE DOESN'T FEEL LIKE SHARING HIS FEELINGS WITH U LEAVE HIM ALONE HE WILL THINK THAT U BUG 2 MUCH!SOME DAY HE'LL COME OUT WITH WHAT IS WRONG! DON'T JUST FORCE THINGS OUT! |
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landoflookbehind
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Must be your first one,most kids become strange at that age. |
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periwinkle
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Please check out this site.
http://www.positivediscipline.com/parents/index.html
See the articals on tncp website:
http://www.naturalchild.com/articles/living_with_children.html
See if there are any parent resource centers in your area. There usually are. If you cant find one or dont know where to begin, contact me and Ill help you. My email is on my profile page.
The people at these places will sit down with you and discuss your concerns and they are usually free or very low cost. The usually have parenting classes as well that you can get individual answers from as well. I have used the one in my area and gotten alot of help from them. I am picky about parenting advice too and they are great people.
If you cant find anything I recommend a counseling session with Jan Hunt from The Natural Child Project. She does phone sessions and is just a wonderful lady.
http://www.naturalchild.com/
http://www.naturalchild.com/counseling/
He is lucky to have such a concerned parent! Really! If only all kids could be that lucky. Please dont give up and there are people who can and will help you and him figure out what is going on.
I wish you the best. |
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tarotmandi
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Honey you don't get your pre-teen to be normal, as long as he's not doing drugs, hurting you, himself or anyone else, let him go. Being a teenager is tough, try and be there for him by backing off and letting him come to you with his problem. |
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lvisthomas
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sometimes its hard for kids to talk to parents , maybe another adult in the family should talk to him |
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Tina
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It could be many things. If he's nearing puberty and his hormones are stirred up that could cause problems or perhaps he may be dabbling with drugs. If I knew what his behavior was like, I could tell you more but I'll do my best with what I've got. Is it possible that he could be exposed to a sexual abuse situation? (Not with you, but a counselor or someone.) If he's acting out, it could be pent up emotion or pain. You need to sit down and talk with him. If he won't talk to you, then consider a therapist or another trusted adult. I am at present trying to get an advice column in the newspaper started for teens and pre-teens. If he doesn't want to talk to you, perhaps he'd feel better asking me questions or confiding in me. Or, you can email me at rilti8@sbcglobal.net. I'll try to help you as best I can. Good luck |
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valisme
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what is your definition of "normal?" Are you trying to make him just like everyone else? Is he embarrassing you because he isn't like your friends' kids? Or is he doing something that might harm himself or others... Those years are a difficult enough time, and if you don't support him, and make him feel that you are ashamed of him, he will move farther away from what you consider "normal." Be a parent, be strong. Be a friend, when possible. Remember how you were at that age.... |
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mystybrz
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It's likely hormones and you just need to ride the wave. Just stay open and listen. I know that it's hard, but there are many of we whom have experienced your exact thoughts and experiences to the max. Here's the good news, kids do come out the other side, but not for a few years. Hang in there and be strong. |
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dtburdick
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Talk nicely and explain things. If that doesn't work try slowly taking priviledges away. If that doesn't work, beat him. If that doesn't work put him up for adoption. |
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Miss Spookiness
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Normal always depends on the point of view. I think as long as he's a healthy kid who doesn't hurt anyone and stays away from drugs or anything of that sort everything should be alright. However the best thing you can do is be there for him, try being his friend even when you'll set a boundary between parent and friend. We can all do many foolish things while growing up but having someone there for us always makes us stay on better ground because you stop yourself from doing things simply because you don't want to see your family hurt if they found out. Now if the changes are negative because he's placing himself in a situation where he or others may get seriously hurt then you'll probably need some good therapist. I've never been a big fan of therapy but I know that sometimes it's very needed. |
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chef matt
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dude what is normal. pre teens are going to be outrageously obnoctious you as a great parent have to be there for him even when hes a "bad" kid. however this usually means that there is a lack of discipline from at least one of the parents. I know it hurts but remember tough love |
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j.man101
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he might be showing signs of early puberty so you should let him be as long he doesn't get out of hand |
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danettaadams
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talk to him and or have someone who he likes talk to him |
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