Ms Fortune
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well peewee Herman would of said " I know you are but what am I ?"... but personally I have my own favorite comebacks...such as " your mother told you , you could be anything you wanted when you grew up , you chose to become an ***hole" or "save your breath , you'll need it later to blow up your date".... gee I have plenty more.... |
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Nemesis
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Shut the **** up you cock juggling thunder ****... or Quit running you *** trap you sperm slurpper . |
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padillav
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"I think it's great that you're facing the truth about who you are and what you're like--but talking so negatively about yourself ALL the time can't be healthy." |
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animated_demon_girl
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here are some that i love to do. if someone says your stupid turn to your friend and say "hey did you hear a pinhead just now?"
or "your so fat and stupid that when you saw a bus being driven by a white person with white kids in there you yelled "POLICE FOLLOW THAT TWINKIE!!"
Or "your so stupid you got hit by a parked car."
or if someone calls you ugly say "ur so ugly that when the night you were born the doctor slapped your mother."
or "your so fat that when you go down to the beach the whales sing 'we are family!'"
or if you really want to get personal "your mom's so stupid that she went to doctor Jay for a boob job."
"Your *** is sooo hairy that a jamacan guy could hop out of there."
this isn't meant to be offensive to the person who says it or the people around who hear it, only to the doorknob that you say it to.
all comebacks were thought up by Jordan and baileigh (me and a friend) |
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a kinder, gentler me
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"I know you are, but what am I?" (repeat indefinately)
"I'm rubber, you're glue..."
"Go **** yourslef with your own (add appropriate word here) you ********* ******* **** ******* **** ***** *******!"
Sorry about all the *'s...it really does sound good, and has ALL the REALLY bad words! |
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pulchritudinous
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So are you. So do I. So do you. |
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DramaGuy
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The most classic comebacks are found in Edmnd Rosatand's 'Cyrano de Bergerac'. Each translation is very different but they are always wonderful. Most of them are dealing with his nose but there are a lot of truly wonderful put-downs as well. |
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muncie birder
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I vote for the one about "Did you forget to take your medicine again this morning?" |
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bobweb
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"My your stressed out today!"
"Did you forget to take your medication again this morning?" |
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larylz70
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I'd have a comeback for that but allof my c@m is in the back of your throat. |
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Telltale Muffin
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"You're a b****" "You wish I was" or "I wish you knew me better"
"I hate you" "Jesus loves you too"
"You suck" "And my sister rides a bicycle!"
Just change the subject.
Or, my favorite strategy:
Return mean comments with kindness.
Just be so unbearably sickeningly sweet to them that it drives them crazy. Offer them candy or gum and smile at them all the time. People who say things like that are trying to get a rise out of you and make you upset, so give them the OPPOSITE. I drives them crazy and they'll suffer big time. It's fun to watch. XD |
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alyaknatasha2006
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YO MAMA!!! |
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rx8 slotcar
 |
i am rubber and you are glue
whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you
or
sticks and stones may hurt me
but whips and chains excite me |
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fantastictaby
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Say nicely as you bow: Why thank you, you are very kind. Then walk away. |
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hanes12000
|
u can comebacks "u too" |
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Who dat
|
Thank You I will take that into consideration. Or
Churchill was at a party and waas drunk, a women walked up to him and said "My good man you are drunk, you need to go home" he replied, :My good woman you are ugly, but at least I will be sober in the morning"
And if you must be REALLLY RUDE and personal tell them
Your __________(insert with...gf/wife/mother/sister) cootch is so dry even the crabs carry canteens.
OR:
Their cootch is so wide that is could be used for nuclear testing. |
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madamspud169
|
* SAVE YOUR BREATH YOU'LL NEED IT TO BLOW UP YOUR DATE
* JEALOUSY IS SUCH AN UGLY EMOTION (THEN WALK AWAY)
* TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE
* WELL I'M JUST GLAD MY PARENTS ARE NOT BROTHER AND
SISTER
* SO I SUCK.................... AND YOU BLOW TOGETHER WE
SOUND LIKE (breath in & out noisily)
* I HATE YOU................... OH I'M CRUSHED
(sarcastically)
* I MIGHT BE A ***** BUT AT LEAST MY DATES ARE BREATHING |
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adieu
|
Means a lot coming from you. Thanks. |
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jbrobinson76
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Try some of these. |
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divapowergirl
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you sound like a toilet when it gets infected by mr.billy bob the cow. not you, i mean the comeback |
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The Answer Guy
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The best one... "Thank you" or just laugh and point at them. |
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♫♪bludaisy♪♫
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And you're fat...:) |
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o_gulina
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i know what u r,but what am i |
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stormmotor2
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1st 1 say just like your mother.
2nd 1 say I dont giva a f--k.
3rd and final to the you suck-say not as good as you can suck SOMEBODYS NAME DIC. try those hope you dont get abused from it. |
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