My brother suddenly passed away a year ago while he was in the middle of a stressful marriage break-up with one child.

Prior to his marriage, he had named my mother as the beneficiary to his life insurance. When his estranged wife (who emphatically claimed there was no life insurance) filed the death certificate with the insurance company, the death benefit was sent to my mother. Mom subsequently paid the funeral expenses (at the estranged wife's request) with the money and has decided to save the rest for the child's college expenses.

Immediately following payment of the funeral expenses, the estranged wife began making threats and saying that the insurance company "made a mistake" and incorrectly disbursed the money & unless my mother turned the money over she would sue. My mother ignored the threats and now the estranged wife has found a slimy lawyer to file a lawsuit in Federal Court against my mother, the insurance company, and the employer for all of the insurance money plus damages for "terror and fright, pain and suffering, emotional distress... " etc.

Last week all attorneys met with the Judge in his chambers. The judge suggested that it would be best for my mother to offer the estranged wife some of the money because it may be determined that it is reasonable to believe that my brother "would have wanted" his wife and child to have the money and could have forgotten to change the beneficiary. He said there exist the possibility that all the money will be awarded to the wife. This goes against everything we have heard.

Our family believes that if we give the wife any of the money it will be squandered and we want it to go to the child's college so we don't want to make any offer. We don't understand why a judge would suggest that the wife has any chance of a ruling in her favor. We have heard nothing other than the LAW says the money goes to the beneficiary - period. Does anyone know why a federal judge would suggest otherwise??? What should we do?