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The Super | Co-signing a loan for girlfriend? |
My girlfriend is stuck in a rut right now, the story goes that her ex had her co-sign for a bunch of stuff and then screwed her over with it, now there are creditors calling her, and she gets to crying and stuff because she cant make the payments, however, Ive given her phone numbers and websites to legit credit counseling and debt help places, she keeps saying that she only has two options, file for bankruptcy or she knows this one person who can co-sign a loan and get her out of it quickly, she's giving me clear hints that Im the person she's referring to, without actually saying so, Ive never co-signed for anyone before based on things my mom taught me about financial responsibilities, my credit is a low 800, I have toyed with the idea of co-signing, but I have a very bad feeling about actually doing so, I dont know what I would be risking, I still owe a little under half of my truck, buying my own house and generally trying to make ends meet, what are your opinions?
Additional Details
She doesnt live with me, has a young boy, says that she would never screw me over like that, and that she would rather file bankruptcy than to have me co-sign and then something happens where she cant pay and my things go down the drain too, I believe her, but I still have a very bad feeling about what Im risking and what I stand to loose. |
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ontopofoldsmokie
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I'm sure you get the point by now. NEVER, NEVER, NEVER cosign anything for anyone for any reason. The reason creditors don't want to loan her money is because they know she will not pay it back. Then they will come after you. You are in the exact position she was in with her last boyfriend. This is a time for you to make the right decision by learning from her what happens when you make the wrong decision in these cases.
But, don't give up hope. She has options. Do NOT cosign for her. But, if you want, pay for her to see a financial counselor. It'll cost you only a few hundred. You want someone to look at her income, expenses, and debts. They will also put her on a budget. You did not state how much she owes or how much she makes so we can't help number wise. If she goes to a credit consolidation company they will say consolidate-and pay us. If she goes to a bankruptcy lawyer he/she will say file for bankruptcy-and pay me. She wants someone looking at the BEST way for her to get out from under. That may be bankruptcy. But, only after all other avenues are explored. If she isn't willing to try then move on. You do not want to be joined at the hip to a spouse that tries to borrow their way out of trouble.
Go to www.daveramsey.com
You'll probably be able to find counselors in your location that will really try to help you and not just make money off you.
Dave Ramsey's methods are hard but they do work. She may be looking at a second job, discontinuing (cable, cell phones, etc...), getting rid of a car that she is paying on, etc...(cutting her lifestyle to nothing for a couple of years vs screwing up her credit, and yours, for a decade). |
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♥ Indigo ♥
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Don't do it!
She sounds like the 'always the victim' type. She'll never keep up with it and then you'll be screwed. |
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Kimberley
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dont co-sign a loan - doesnt anyone round here watch judge judy!
seriously its a bad idea, she should go to a debt management team first |
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golferwhoworks
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DON'T DO IT! you can be stuck for all of it the minute you sign. |
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darx07
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if she defaults on the loan, you are 100% responsible for paying it back. whether or not if she intends to screw you over or not, it could happen unintentionally.
i know this is a worst case scenario, but lets say she gets in a car accident and can't work or even dies. you will be the one responsible for the loan.
honestly, i say don't do it. she is your girlfriend not your wife which means its not final. she should probably file for bankruptcy and work her way to good credit score.
i know you may feel bad about the situation, but you have to protect yourself. especially if you are trying to make ends meet. you don't need financial stress. |
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Sandy
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Always go with your gut feeling.
Co-signing is probably not a good thing for you.
Maybe you can help her other ways... just not this way.
Good luck. |
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Repairmanjack
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I think you already know that you should not do this.
She's doing the same thing her ex did to her...but to you.
She has to step up to the plate and take responsibility for her own mistakes and her own financial future. Don't let her ruin you...intentionally or not.
There's an old saying: Do not get involved with someone that has more problems than you do.
Listen to your mother. |
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oohch1ckapuhchoo
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never do it. never do things together until MARRIAGE. can't she rely on family members? otherwise, tell her to pick up a second job. |
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jameslia13
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Don't do it!! She is not your wife and money has a way of changing a relationship big time. You have given her advice and resources to use, that is all you can do. Do not become a resource for her unless you are prepared to take a financial loss. (I'm not saying she will screw you over but it is a possibility with anyone you co-sign for or loan money to). |
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Josh B
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This is a difficult issue for you because you are going to have to make some hard decisions, but please consider what I am saying. Cosigning is a bad deal especially since she is your girlfriend. First what if you guys have a bad breakup and she does not pay then the creditors will be coming after you (lowering your credit score). If she files bankruptcy after you cosign then they will once again come after you. Now what if you guys stay together after you cosign and she misses a couple of payments? This will most likely put t strain on your relationship. Finally, one of the things that worries me about your situation is that she is not willing to ask you for the cosign. She wants to play games and try to get you to say you will do it.
Now for her situation she has put herself in a bad situation because of what she did with her ex. This should be a lesson to her to never do that again. I am not trying to be mean but we have all done stupid things and hopefully we have learned from them. Next she needs to consider taking a second job to help pay down her bill until she pays off her debt. Right now she is freaked out because these collection guys are jerks. If I were you I would help her to find a way to take another job to get rid of this debt and help her to find someone like her family to watch her child while she works. These steps will take a while to accomplish and they are not a quick fix. Though, if you guys follow this process you will build a stronger relationship and never get in this situation ever again. With the bankruptcy it is like giving up and then you are more likely to get back in the same problem later.
If you like my answer please visit my blog: http://joshssimplelife.wordpress.com/ |
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bdancer222
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DON'T DO IT!!! Never co-sign anything with someone you are not married to.
Frankly if all the legit credit counseling palces are telling her to file bankruptcy, she should do that. If she can't afford to pay all the bills, getting them all rolled into one big loan ain't gonna make it easier to pay off. |
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STEVEN F
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If you want to GIVE her money, that is your choice. If you 'co-sign' you have decided to GIVE her the money. I recommend skipping the middleman. |
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Bob W
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The RULE for co-signing is never do it for any reason, never ever. Get the point? |
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Ryan
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DO NOT DO THIS. By attaching yourself to her bad credit you are exposing yourself to serious risk.
She could default, and then you are the one in the bad situation hoping for a new GF to bail you out. Taking on this loan will effect your credit and future borrowing as well. |
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MVD34
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So she's been screwed over and now she wants to be rescued by the "big man hero?"
Sounds like the kind of thinking that let her to her current disaster: she wants "daddy" to do all of her thinking and planing for her. Then when he fails her, she can boo-hoo to the next "daddy" about how the last man was so mean to her...while she bats her pretty browns eyes and waits for him to rescue her...
If she is unwilling to do anything for herself, including counseling, you should urge her to seek legal counseling for bankruptcy. If she truly cares for you, this will stop the endless hemorrhaging and give the opportunity to see if she herself is capable of handling her own money (before you "settle down" any further with her).
On the other hand, if all she really wants is for you to fix her problems for her, she will leave you once you absolutely refuse.
Absolutely refuse to co-sign. Tell her it isn't an option for anyone, ever, period. |
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jackson
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When your gut says no the answer is NO. So what happens later when she moves on to the next guy with the sob story?
Your credit is your life. Best to let her sort it out on her own and then later if she needs some help in some way maybe do so. You don't live together and are not married.
Your credit will effect the home buying and rates. Homeowners insurance rates. Car insurance rates. The list is endless.
Don't do it even if it sacrifices your relationship. If she really cares for you she will still want you after she works it out. |
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jose z
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Whenever it comes to money think of yourself as a banker. This way you avoid getting guilt trips which people, especially loved ones and family, give you. A banker will never get swayed by emotions and will do eveything by the book. As for your question, " NO, do not lend her nothing."
She is thinking of filing for bankruptcy and obviously has a low credit scores. Be smart dude. When you are in the hole your credit will be there to save your butt first. |
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neonlights1971
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Let her have someone else co sign for a loan to pay it all off.. If you have a bad feeling follow your gut feeling thats the cheapest way to go I'd say.. Good luck! |
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Jeanne R
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I'm sure that her ex also told her that he would never leave her in the lurch for his bills either. Whatever you do, DO NOT cosign. If she has to file bankruptcy, that is bad for her but not tragic. What would be tragic is you losing your home for someone you have never met (ie-her ex). |
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