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(Anonymous) | Does my mom have a right to do this? |
I was molested at 5 years old and this really hurts that my mom could do this to me. I get money for the rest of my life. My parents sued the town of norwood massachusetts, the school, the bus company, and the bus driver that molested me. When I was 12 she told me to put my first check right in the bank and don't spend it. Then she goes and asks me for some money. My first check was 7,000 dollars. She took 2,000 of it and paid the mortgage. I do not have my license or a job so I live with her still. She was trying to help me get my license and then calls me to ask for money my second check was when I turned 21 and I got 10,000 dollars she asked for a 1,000 for first last and security for rent. She then asked me for 450 for a divorce lawyer which she should be paying on her own and not be using me for my money. She then asked me for 223 for her car insurance payment then she asked for 100 to pay back her bf now she's asking me for 300 for her car because its antifreezing or something. And she said to me well I should be giving her money because she carts me around. What should I do? |
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Jen
|
Take some money, buy your own car, move out and get on with your life. Your mom is using you. My mom did the same thing to me on a settlement I received when I turned 18. Just to shut her up and get on with my life I gave her the money she wanted. I never got asked again. |
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Michelle K
 |
First I'd like to say that it's not fair what happened to you as a little girl.
Second. Your mom is using you. By you getting these checks it's giving your mom a reason to be greedy and perhaps even lazy.
You have a job, I assume, which is a good source of income aside from what you've got in your bank account. What I would do is find a place to rent. Not too fancy and expensive in rent price. But somewhere suited for a person your age, maybe a 1 bedroom apartment. Depending on where you live can depend on the price ranges and quality of apartments.
You'll be living on your own which makes you more independent, and is less embarrassing when you bring a partner to your place. Your mom has no right to be asking you to pay for her car insurance or for all of rent or for a lawyer, especially not to pay her boyfriend back.
If you continue to live with your mom simply put your foot down on her asking you for money habbits. I can understand pitching in for gas and splitting rent and food bills. But it is not your car you do not need to be paying for the insurance. Getting a license is easy, and you could get your own car.
Don't let your mom do this to you. If she tries to lay guilt trip on you, simply tell her that she needs to get a higher paying job or move if she can't handle rent costs. It's not your responsibility as her child to support her. Tell her she's been an adult longer than you have and it's time she learns how to take care of herself. It sounds rude and she'll probably be upset with you for a while. But time heals wounds and you'll get your mom back. And if you don't get her back, then all she wanted was your money after it happened.
Hope this helped even just a little. Good luck. |
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heather b
 |
I would say since you are an adult you should now be in charge of your own money and trust. Don't give her money when she asks. Simple as that. You're being taken advantage of and I'm sorry for that. Get a job, get a place of your own, get a roommate if you have to and I would also recommend getting a counselor or someone to talk to like a therapist. You obviously are still dealing with your abuse or else you wouldn't bring it up in a public forum like this. At some point, unfortunately, you are responsible for saying enough is enough and telling her no, then taking your life into your own hands. It appears your mother has issues, too, and you're not responsible for that. |
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sweet_heartj_02
 |
i take it your over the age of 21??? you need to take your money get an house or condo then a car and take care of yourself, so then when she asks you for money and you dont want to give her none, you can always say you got bills too and you dont have enough to be lending out. then start naming all the bills you have to pay lol, that should run her off..lol |
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STARBUCKS RULES!!!
|
First of all I'm sorry that such a horrid thing happened to you.
Second, no you're mom shouldn't be taking money from you. Stop giving her money, and if she argues, just tell her too bad. If you keep giving her money she's just going to expect you to give her money every single time that she needs it. The next step would be to get your lisence, and move out. With the money you have left, you could rent and apartment or something, and immediately go out and find a job.
She's using you. Don't let her continue. |
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J L
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shes basically pimping you out sue the ***** then write a book about it and get more$$$ |
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mrs. MJ
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your mom is using you and depending on you because of the money your recieving.....my mom did that to me and i moved out.......my cousin also pays half of her moms bills because she has alot of cash in her account......my auntie told me that she does depend on her daughter and that she uses her for money.......parents do what they want when they know that thier child is not going to defend thierselves.......tell your mom that you can't help her all the time in a respectful way |
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Shodan
 |
I agree with the others... stop giving her money.. she needs to deal with her own finances... move out and use your settlement money for your own life. |
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terribrooke
 |
My first response was: Buy a car and tell her to get a job.
But after thinking about this, since you were a minor when you got your first check, I would have thought that it would have been put up in a CD or trust for when you turned 18 or 21 or even in some cases 25. Neither you or your parents would have had access to the funds until then.
No matter, either way tell her to get a job and stop giving her money. |
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gazuk
 |
it sounds like your mother will keep coming to you for money until your settlement is ll gone.
if she is unable to pay her finance commitments then she need s to be looking at debt consolidation or similar. if you keep giving then your mother will just keep coming more and more often |
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Astrolion
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Stop giving your mom money !
If you continue, it will become a life long habit for her to expect you to give her money, for whatever purpose.
Stop now before it's too late and all your money is gone. |
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bud68
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You should move out, become independent and say no when she asks for your money. |
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