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stevejohnson007 | Help With Over My Sons Debts? |
Hello all, I was wondering if anyone could help me out with a family problem.
I have discovered this week that my 24 year old son has quite high debts with four different finance companies. He has never told me about this before, up until I found out this week through some letters he had in his bedroom.
I have spoke to him about the debts, and have told him I would be willing to help him out.
What I would like to do is take over his debts, so I know they will be paid every month, through him giving me the money, and me paying the money to the various companies.
I would also like these companies to address any communication to myself, as if they address it to him, I would not know whats going on.
Does anyone know if finance companies would allow my name to be put onto his account, so that the money owed would be guaranteed to be paid.
I hope the above makes sense!!
Thanks for looking... |
 |
 
ascoile
 |
You are wise to be concerned because if he lives with you then a bad debtor affects the credit score of everyone at that address.
As he is over 18 it is unlikely that they would allow what you are suggesting because of data protection etc.
However as they will be keen to get their money they will be happy to come to some arrangement with you.
Best idea would be to conatct each company, explain the situation and ask them what is the best way to proceed. When they grasp the situation I am sure they will be able to suggest the best way to handle it.
Must have come as a shock to you, hope it's a lesson learned for the future as far as your son is concerned. |
|
cah1340
 |
STOP!!! What you are doing is saying to your son, its ok you are in debt, mummy will bail you out! I am not talking out of my backside, have been there and done it! It wont help him in the long run.
Now, advice, there is a company called payplan. Its www.payplan.co.uk. They will talk to your son, work out who he owes money to, how much he can afford to repay each month then they will help him open a bank account and set up an on line system where he can monitor how much is paid to who each month. He will be sent a paying in card that he will have to pay a certain amount each month, it can be paid at any pay point. You can support him with this, but for gods sake don't make it ok for him to do this, because if you do, he will do it over and over again for the rest of his life, you will be bailing him out when he is 50!
Teach him now that it is his responsibility, he must deal with it but you will be there to guide him along the way. |
|
The Scorpion
 |
What you type makes sense, but the philosophy behind what you want to do is wrong. Most young people have to experience this so that they can LEARN how to manage their financial life. If you simply solve this problem for him, he learns nothing and just repeats the mistakes over and over. Why is your 24 year old son still in a bedroom? He's living with you? YIKES. It's time to let him grow up and take care of his own affairs, not time to elongate his childhood with easy parental solutions to his problems. |
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src50
|
Your son is 24. High time he took responsibility for his own actions instead of you "taking over." |
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jacs
|
they may do this if your son gives them his consent but you may become liable as well for the debts |
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La Vie Boheme
 |
I don't know if this is possible. These companies legally need to deal with the person who owes the debt unless of course a credit counseling service is involved. |
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Bunny
 |
I doubt very much the finance companies would address the letters to you as their agreement is with your son
i would think closely about what you are doing - you are taking over all the admin responsibility and so your son will not have to put any effort into paying off his debts - all he has to do is give you the money and you will do all the hard work.
he has got himself into this and he needs to take responsibility for getting himself clear of debt. I am not suggesting that you leave it all to him but he should be able to open a letter and discuss each letter and cheque to be sent with you.
If you are going to help him out then he needs to be honest with you and it sounds as though you do not trust him.
If you take over the debts you could be left being responsible and losing your home or your possessions to bailiffs when you cannot pay off his debt
have you been in touch with the CAB - they will help your son set a plan and they will help reach an agreement with each company as to how much he is paying off.
However I really do stress that he has to play an active part in remedying these debts otherwise he will do the same thing again and expect you to do all the hard work after he gets into debt again
I would also insist that he takes a look at what this money has been spent on and why he bought things that he could not afford
Good luck - have a look at the site below - the discussion sites will be really helpful for you and your son and their is a fantastic budget plan that you can down load and your son can plan his future spendings on
http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/
EDIt - to the scorpion - far too many young people cannot afford a home these days because it is too expensive to buy or to rent in the UK - and would lead to getting into further debt! |
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funkyduck
|
He'll never learn from this mistake if you bail him out, even with what you are doing! He ran the debt up and he needs to be the one to take responsability being the adult he is! |
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PATRICK
|
let your son short himself out, he's old enough to make his own mistakes. |
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doc bob
|
If your son still lives with you, and you really want to help him with this - make him give you all of his pay and then pay his bills and give him an allowance. It sounds childish, but if you don't want him to grow up and handle all of this on his own you need to still treat him like a child. That's not going to do him any good. But at a minimum DO NOT get your name included with any part of this debt. |
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poppy
|
talk to the individual finance companies he has debt in and see if they would go for that. otherwise are you sure its such a great idea? he could just faff off and go into more debt letting you have to pick up the pieces which could get you in deep water. otherwise you could get him declared incompetent and take over his finances so he couldnt enter another legal contract haha |
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NIGEL D
|
Give them a try ---you never know until you try--ther`s no reason why they shuoldn`t |
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Stephanie
|
Hi my son is 18 and he has got himself into debt with contract phones alltogether he has six he does not go to work he gets js allowance he does not worry about them I keep on telling him to phone up debtline |
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