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mimi72 | I need advice about if I should divorce him? I think he was using me? |
About 4 month ago my husband kick me out of his home with all my clothes( I said his home because before marriage he made me sigh a Pre-Nup agreement and I did)
We got married 3 years ago
The main reason why we are apart was MONEY, he wanted me to pay 1/2 of everything, I used to pay 1/2 of his Mortgage , utilities plus expensas.
But the big problem was when he asked me to pay 1/2 of the mensually payment of his Sport car ( his car is not on my name, he bought it before marriage) also he wanted me to help with the payments of his Credit Cards ( he owns about $13,000 and again I never used those cards and there not on my name) cause of that he decided we should be apart for a while or forever...
Right now I'm living at my parents home
He always make more money than I do but anyway he wanted me to pay 1/2 ! He did not care if I have some money left for me or nothing. He is very bossy and rude
I'm still loving him but he was using me! I'm very sad and upset
Additional Details
Now I'm not sure if he married me because he loved me or just to have somebody to help pay his bills each month.
Actually his home, Sport car, boat belong to him becuase he bought all that before marriage and anyway is in the Pre- Nuptial Agreement.
And one day he told me _ you must help me with my mortgage paymets because if you need to rent you must pay , right?
He told me if I want 1/2 of his home I should pay him $45,000 because he gave for down payment $ 90,000
While I was living with him we bought a lot together ex: Furniture, appliances, barbecue grill, etc
Now I'm here without NOTHING, only with my car, my clothes and little of money in my bank.
But I'm still working hard and I'm going to start saving money only for me!!
The other day I was driving by his home and 2 weekends was more than 11.00 pm and he was not home and yesterday ( friday) was a green car parking in his driveway , mmm I'm assume he is seeing another person, while I'm here very sad ... |
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phoenixfinca
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Your problem was the signing of the pre-nuptial agreement. You must seek legal advice through the Legal Aid Society. He is taking you for a ride. You sound foreign and so should seek consular advice from your country of origin as well. Good luck. |
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AB
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I think he has been using you. you should get a lawyer and see if you can get any of your money back and i would find someone more loving and caring than this person to live with. the world is full of corrupt self centred people, but there are good souls to be found as well. Move on, but after getting your dues! |
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fairbetsy
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Dump the bas**rd and don't look back. |
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Mark W
 |
Yes. Its time for you to leave him. The first thing to do is consult with a divorce lawyer and find out what steps you should take next.
As someone said, you may be entitled to more than you think, particularly if he increased his wealth, or his situation drastically improved during your marriage. Get a lawyer and start asking questions.
Be smart, be safe, and be careful. |
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mother
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Sounds like this guy is confused between a wife and a roommate.
He was looking for a financial partner- not a wife. Move on. |
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Pengy
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This does not sound like any marriage I have ever seen, Think your being used as an additional income and not much else. Believe me you are better of without this fool. Just do not see any love in this arrangement |
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C C
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Sounds like he was using you..
Be happy you two split and just think now your money can go to your bills and car in your name.
Talk to a lawyer about prenup..there maybe things you might be entitled while you were married. |
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katerschenko
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I thought pre nups were only for millionaires! He is definitely planning to swallow up all your money. How ridiculous to be asked to pay for half a house you don't own and as for the credit cards......CRAZY !
He does not love you and no matter how much you love him, it will not change him.
It sounds like his business plan is to make you bankrupt and make himself very wealthy.
Ditch him now.....do it! |
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dodong1127
 |
I think you should first consult a lawyer about that matter, and you really should divorce him, though in the end its your decison that matter most I believe marriage should be a give and take relationship, if the other doesn't give what is due then its futile to be pursuing it. . . .well I hope and pray that you'll choose the right decisons. God speed. . . |
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DebtFree
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if you are married, nothing wrong with paying 1/2 if you are working and able... unless he makes so much you don't need to work.
when you are married, it's no longer "your money, my money" or "your debt my debt"...
it's.. OUR money... and OUR debt.
money and debt is the #1 cause of divorce in america today... people who are not in agreement about money should never get married... their will be problems. |
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cherrypopsickle2000
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He does not love you. (sorry to be so blunt), but that is the reality of it. I think you were in love with the idea of being married.
I believe, he threw you out because he has another woman. (green car in driveway) is a dead give a way! Get the divorce, move on with your masters degree. Take some time to heal..
Then in time..you will find someone, hopefully, that will treat you the right way.
Remember this...A man will treat you according to how YOU allow him to treat you...
Let the bum go and move on to something better and enjoy your life, don't waste it on someone who does not care for you...move on ..you will meet someone nice in the future...just don't be his sucker! |
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Heather Z
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Baby girl! First off you should have never moved into "his" home and got a home that had both of your names on it. 2nd this guys sounds a little off,but you picked him. So I would go to a lawyer tell them all that you have tell what the prenupt is and what is protected. Then tell him all the stuff that you helped pay for. You helped pay for food, clothes, utilities, so you contributed to the marriage. This guy is not going to get all of it unless you stop fighting. USUALLY the court splits it down the middle. So if he gets the house then you get the lot or he has to pay you off. Just for the future when you sign a prenupt make sure you take care of yourself in there too. But he sounds like he has no idea about marriage and really honey neither do you. I am not being mean but you should expect to be a team and that means share everything. Its not mine or yours anymore its ours. So get some financial counseling and emotional counseling --chalk this up to experience and find a better man for your future. But just make sure that you get what you deserve out of this marriage/divorce, because the reason he picked you is because he KNEW he could dominate you. Don't let him. Be strong! |
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anaknivictoria
 |
Love is supposed to be unconditional. A marriage should be built on respect and a loving and nurturing relationship. It seems that your marriage is full of conditions -- it sounds more like a business deal than a relationship. From what you've written, I have not read any positive things about your husband and you even said that he's rude and bossy. You are a person that is full of love and you should give it (your love) to someone worth loving... someone who respects and understands you. |
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rumnroot
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What a deadbeat. Take him to court and get him to pay alimony. |
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Frank Castle
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He should pay for his car.
He should pay for his house.
You don't get married to get some help paying your bills because usually wifes are VERY EXPENSIVE.
There are many things women need to buy and men don't and married men usually pay for them.
It's not fair to let him pay for everything either.
It's not that uncommon to help with some money to your husband.
I think he is right about the house. If you want 50% of his house then you should give him $45,000.00 and 50% of every monthy payment he has made so far.
However, husbands are supposed to protect thir wives from the wind, the sun, the rain and the wild animales wandering the jungle with a house and she is not supposed to pay rent.
Your husband is right about some things and you are right about some things.
I do think you should speak to him and take out of the house everything you ever bought with your own money.
Do not try to steal things from his house or you could be arrested.
If some things were bought between the two of us then take them and give him a check for 50% of the thing and tell him to wait until you have a job to cash it.
Did you went to college?
I think now it's the right time to go back to school to get a college degree or an MBA. (This means you will make twice the money he now makes in the future)
He is middle class and he cannot afford to have you.
If I were you I would divorce him.
I suggest you to save at least a year of salary BEFORE YOU GET MARRIED AGAIN.
I suggest you to buy a car (Newer than his) BEFORE YOU GET MARRIED AGAIN.
I suggest you to save at least 50% of your salary until you have at least $45,000.00 to buy a house BEFORE YOU GET MARRIED AGAIN. |
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