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brex25 | My mom sent me a check for my 21st b-day for $400, but I know my parents can't afford it. How should I react? |
My parents have run into some financial trouble and have not been able to finance any part of my college education and I have not asked them too. Unfortunately I had trouble coming up with the money to pay my tuition bill, so I had to accept a parent-loan to cover the balance. They never talked with me about it but my plan was that I would be making regular payments to my parents to pay off the loan myself, in their name. But then she sent me a $400 check on my birthday, which I know is way beyond their means. Should I accept it? Return it? I having even begun to send them money to cover the loan payments.
Thanks |
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jame617
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You could always sit down or call them up and talk to them, tell them that you dont feel comfortable taking their money while money is tight right now, if they dont want to take it back and want you to have it (which most parents would). I would save the $400 and use it towards paying off the parent-loan, that way your not really spending it on silly stuff you used it smartly and it could be considered as them helping you with school, you both win. |
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evie_honey
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talk to your parents about it, if they insist on you keeping the money and you still feel bad about it, maybe give half back? |
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Smartass
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I must pat you on the back, nothing in this world more rewarding and touching than to know a child can appreciate and realize financial limits.
So if I were you, I'd just tell them I'm willing to send it back and thank them very much, they'd be nothing but happy. |
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John
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It's your parents. Just give them a call and talk about it. Communication can solve lots of things. Maybe they ran in to some money and can afford. Either way, they'll know you care. |
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tankayanka
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bless you for being a good child.send it back in a loan payment.there never know.you mite hurt there feelings otherwise.speaking as a parent,we do things b/c we love you knuckleheads.even if money's tighter than a duck's butt |
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WhoMe?
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It sounds like they are really trying to help you, at their own expense. I would imagine that it really hurt them to not be able to help you with your college education, and this is a way for them to make-up for a little of that. You must have wonderful parents. It would probably hurt their feelings if you were to return it, but my suggestion would be for you to use that money to start repaying them for the loan they gave you. |
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tonalc1
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While logic seems to dictate that you send it back or just increase your loan repayments, your parents want you to have something very special for a special birthday (but left that choice up to you).
I would thank them, and honor the gift by getting yourself something great--a spa weekend, a beautiful coat, etc.--and let them know what you got.
If you still harbor a bit of guilt about it, you could get something for less money, then use the rest for repayment on the loan. |
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jennie
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Good for you!! & your parents raised a wonderful child. Are you sure they can't afford it? Maybe they came into a little $ and would make them feel good if keep it- just pick up the phone, thank them & let them know you'll understand if they don't want you to cash it right now. If they insists that you keep it, then don't worry about it. |
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Lil Ay
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umm just talk to them about it and why u dotn want the money. if they ansist of you to take it then take it or just take some of it like $100. i know how u feel. |
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Kendal's Mommy
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I would call my parents and thank them a ton for sending me the money but explain to them that they have already done way more than enough for you. If they really insist on giving you this money, ask them to knock it off the loan. Rip up the check and tell them you love um! |
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shiprepairwoman
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Keep the gift and send a thank you note. Then start sending them a few hundred a month towards your debt. If they can't afford food take them some but don't reject the gift or think you know their entire budget they may have been happy to be able to do this for you.
Happy Birthday. |
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Lloyd B
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I've been in this situation and I 'forgot' to deposit the check.
Talking to your parents is great advice, but they won't necessarily be open with you about their financial situation.
If you 'forget' to deposit or cash the check and they later bring it up and insist on you taking it, then explain your concerns. |
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Frank Castle
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Get a job and pay your bills. |
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