How do I ask a (some what creepy) room mate to leave?

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Katie

How do I ask a (some what creepy) room mate to leave?

I need to ask my roommate to move out. I have tried to resolve the situation, but he doesnвЂ™t seem to get it. I have to admit, itвЂ™s partly my faultвЂ¦ letting someone move in that I donвЂ™t even know; but I really needed the money. I am not going to go on and on about all of the little things he does, in short he isnвЂ™t respectful of my space or my property and he over steps his boundaries. I own the house (I am paying a mortgage and itвЂ™s in my name only). I put an ad on the internet and he was the only one who answered it. I know I need to ask him to leave because the itвЂ™s causing me more stress than I can bear, I hate being home and it doesnвЂ™t even feel like home anymore. I have tried talking to him about the issues I have, but he just acts like it never happened. I would like to give him 30 days to move out, but I am afraid that he might do something. I get a creepy stalker kind of vibe from him. I am afraid he will do something to my house or my stuff or my cat or maybe just crank up all
Additional Details
the heaters and runt he electricity way up (electricity is very expensive here). Please, what would be the best way to ask him to leave and what is an appropriate amount of time to give him to leave and how do I keep him from doing anything crazy?

plan_ner

I suggest you have a sit down talk and explain that the living situation is not working out for you. Since the place is yours he needs to move out. Give him a reasonable amount of time to find a new place but make sure it is defined.

If you treat people with respect, they will usually reciprocate.

Once he is out, change the locks and have friends and family around for support.

I belive the best way is this:
1. Have a friend or family around but not in the same room.
2. State firmly but nicely that "I am having a difficulties with our living situation and I need to ask you to find another place to live. If he asks why or what he can to do fix it, just reply that it is not him and that you need more presonal space.
3. Immediately follow up with how much time do you think you will need to find another place. It should not be longer than 45 days. If he tries to ask for more time, explain that you cannot provide more and offer to assist him in his search.

Once the conversation is over, hand him a 30 day written notice for termination of tenancy. Explain that this is required by law and if he needs a week or two extra that "might" be acceptable.

Bren

Just tell him straight up because you are the one whose paying for everything.That sounds mean (I know)
or
you can tell him that you are moving out so he can leave!

Leela

With pepper spray in your pocket and the police on speed dial. Just *tell* him to leave, his name is not on the mortgage and if there's no written lease that says he gets thirty days he's a GUEST. Maybe take your cat to your friend's house first... I'd be afraid for my lovely furry friend too.

BOKO

His stuff on the porch, locks changed. If he knocks, call the cops. Get tough, baby.

shevuuks j

when he goes out of the house for awhile, change the lock and throw his stuff out and if he tries anything crazy... GET A RESTRAINING ORDER!!! ; )

Mia

Make an elaborate lie up....it's the only way out of this situation. Tell him the building is going co-op. Or
You're moving so he has to move (obviously once he's left you don't move). How long has he been there? If it's only been a while just say you don't think you two are compatible as roomates so you're gonna have to ask him to find someplace new to live. Try to be nice even if he's creepy.
Say you'd prefer to live with a girl....take up smoking & drive him out lol just kidding....Raise his rent and when he can't afford it, evict him - lots of options. You're gonna have to be cruel...

Caiti

You don't ask them to leave, they leave on their own. Try this website.

http://ourworld.compuserve.com/homepages/nagorski/roommate.htm

dchead22

If your afraid of a conflict, make him want to leave... jack up his rent to an almost ridiculous price, or do the little things that bug him. If you're afraid he'll do something to you after he's gone, call a male relative or friend to come over to stay a while to make sure this guy doesn't try anything. If you're really afraid that this creeper will do something, you might need to be more aggressive- file for a restraining (but this costs money and you need a good reason). And if you're even more afraid, you might want to keep a weapon near you're bed when you sleep. I'll let you decide what that means (you can't misfire a baseball bat). Obviously, the weapon idea is only if things get really creepy. If you do decide to take the direct "you have thirty days" approach, be sure that you're assertive and hold your ground. Creepy guys don't like assertive people and are less likely to retaliate.

D. M

Simply tell him that it's not working out, and he'
ll need to find other living arrangements. The ammt. of time you give him is up to you, but 2 weeks is reasonable. If he signed a lease with you, that may change things, but if he's not on paper, you can kick him out whenever you want.

Rachel<3

just tell him he has to the end of the month to leave and that u own the house so u have a right to kick him out and if he does anything crazy call the cops.

Ms. Mimsie

I think that thirty days is customary. Also, you need to know the laws regarding tenant evictions in your area. Take a look at these sources for more info:

http://www.scholarships.com/Evicting-A-Roommate.aspx

http://www.expertlaw.com/library/real_estate/evicting_tenant.html

http://www.expertlaw.com/

country girl

In a letter sent certified mail (I know you live there but you need it documented that you sent and gave proper notice to him) inform him that he has 30 days to vacate the premises. You don't have to have a reason. If he should ask, tell him that things have changed and you don't need a roommate any longer and that he has until the end of the month to be completely moved out. Be nice and pleasant but be strong and forceful too. If he threatens you call the police and they will escort him out immediately.

~~ *lilly* ~~ PRO-JONAS

ask someone to do it for you

find him a nicer house

get a police man to help you tell him <---seriously they will do it. if you feel threatened than do so.

Dawni Do Right

I truly feel for you. I had the same situation, only with a friend. I felt bad because his GF had just died of cancer, so I let him move in my spare room.

While he was fun to hang out with, he was a NIGHTMARE to live with. He was & still is a chronic alcoholic & I often found myself leaving my own home at all hours in any attempt to avoid him bumbling around the kitchen cooking & then spilling his food in route to his room or wanting to talk when I was all settled in for a nice quiet evening at home. Even physical groping at me.

After 6 months, I had my super-sized boy friend serve him with a notice that he had 30 days to find other living arrangements. We didn't have a formal lease agreement & our's was verbal, but I truly was at Room Mate Meltdown & could no longer deal with him.

Have a large muscular friend over for dinner & have him serve a notice to vacate. Or leave it on the kitchen counter. In this case, you can maybe just state that you have had a chance to re-evaluate your situation & this arrangement just isn't working for you.

Don't be above resorting to a fib or two if the situation warrants, like a sister is moving back to town, grand mother, boy friend... Whatever it takes with the least amount of grief. It will be hard enough tolerating the remainder of his tenancy without getting resentment or revenge on his part.

Try to have things on a positive note for now & you should not have to worry about retaliation. If push comes to shove, you may have to pull out the big guns & get legal advise.

Й‘ivОі.

Be the most annoying roommate ever. Leave hair in the drain be a messy pig for awhile. Find out his fears and pet peeves.
Just try moving out, you don't deserve to live like that.

Dale H

You probably cannot just kick him out because he lives there. You can ask him to leave and give him 30 days to find another place or start the eviction process (check the laws in your area) if you want to be sure you can get him out. If he leaves voluntarily, that would be great. At the first sign of trouble, call the cops. Then you may be able to shorten the eviction process if he has violated the law.

Be more careful before next time. Have you seen Pacific Heights? It could have been worse from the sound of it.

Good luck!

Kimmy3

You need to WRITE a 30-day notice and make sure he gets it certified, that way he has to sign for it and is proof that he received notice OR make a copy and give the copy to him. You have a lease and, even though it is month-to-month, I would play it safe and give 30 days. When you do write your notice to vacate, explain that the living situation is not working out for you and that he needs to find alternate living arrangements. You can take your cat to a friends house or boarding kennel in the meantime and set up a video camera in your house to record him. If something happens to your stuff in the meantime, then you know who did it.

If you need another roommate, then advertise in your LOCAL newspaper or Craigslist and very carefully interview and pick through the potential candidates. This will help you find someone that is more suitable to your personality and more keen on abiding personal space and property lines. You need to start advertising NOW rather than when he is out. This will take out any down-time for your room for rent, and keep you from falling behind.

If he refuses to leave, then have the police come and escort his sorry hide off your property and out of your life. Play it safe and give him 30 days to vacate. After 30 days, he is trespassing.

Mary T

hmm, you could talk to the landlord and tell the creepo that you both think its time for him to move out

JacquieB

Tell him you are getting married. Or your significant other is moving in. go to whatever extent you have to to initiate him wanting to move. Tell him you are taking in foster children. Tell him you are starting a doggie daycare. How about telling him you are going to start a halfway house for reforming drug addicts or a home for abused spouses. WHATEVER! LIE< LIE LIE. Whatever it takes. Give him his 30 days but get a move on!

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