How do you keep the man you love when he is attached or seeing other women,but you love him so much.?

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momo6a4ever

How do you keep the man you love when he is attached or seeing other women,but you love him so much.?

i mean this man is all i think about but he is married and is seeing other women besides me....we have been seeing each other for 13 years and still is seeing each other and i love him so much til it hurts so bad...what do a woman do in this situation? he spends no time with me at all except for when we are intimate with each other then he blames it on his job and that he is so tired and on and on and on..am i sick or something or is there dust on me? someone out there help me out.....

blondie

First I have to say that kunjaldp's comment was completely uncalled for! You put your question in the wrong section, but SO FRICKING WHAT?! If he labels every person who ever makes a tiny little mistake a "loser," then my guess is that he's a really pitiful excuse for a human being and he'll be really lonely (if he isn't already) because NOBODY will ever want to have anything to do with him -- and guess what -- that makes HIM a LOSER! OK, now that I've gotten that off my chest, let me answer your question.

I have to let you know that I was in the same situation a few years ago. I'd been with a man for 11 years (he was unmarried) and I was emotionally tortured by his escapades with other women, which he didn't even make an effort to keep secret from me. I wasted so much time trying to figure out how to make him faithful and how to make him love me enough to treat me the way I longed to be treated. When it started affecting other aspects of my life (I wasn't sleeping well or eating right, which, in turn, affected my job performance), I sought counseling. It took a little while, but I finally came to realize that I deserved much better, and as long as I was with him, I was never going to be happy. Loving somebody shouldn't make you miserable. After some work on myself in counseling, I got the emotional strength to leave him -- the best thing I ever did for myself! Yes, it hurt like hell at first, but the good news is that the pain was only temporary. If I'd stayed with him, I would have been in emotional pain for however long I remained with him. And a bonus -- I was free to live my life the way I wanted and to meet somebody else (which I did). Now I'm in a very stable, faithful and incredibly wonderful relationship with a man who treats me like a princess! So, my advice to you is to first get some counseling to work on yourself (not the relationship) so that you can gain the self confidence and strength to do what you need to do (which is leave the man). From there, a whole wonderful world awaits you -- you'll see. Good luck!

kunjaldp

You loser, this is a business section not a psycho section.

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ftic_99

I don't want to sound insensitive, but, you're best by dumping him. You have only pointed out negatives about him so either you have a low self esteem or you're a masochist. Do you want an STD? 'Cause that is high risk behavior there.

rodswelling71

really its all about the quantity and quality of the sex for men, not much else matters

so f u c k him like a pornstar

jhall_photography

Sweetie, you need to find out what love is. Start by loving your self enough to stop having contact with this man. You need your own man. One who will love YOU and be with YOU. You deserve that. Nothing that starts bad will end good. Pray.

campuswonderboy

connect deeply with each other, so deep in fact that you are willing and ready to let the other go because you realize that life is transient and you feel what love is so there is no fear.

R.G.P.G

It's is really hard to keep someone that you love when that person doesn't love you anymore. There is not that much you can do about it. If you really love him let him go. When we love someone we want his/her happiness before ours.

preash70

Well the bad thing is you are the other woman. It seems to me he is not going to leave his wife and he is not going to be faithful no matter what relationship he is in. You need to move on and get some counseling.

mybizyagottaknowthat2

My mom was in the same position. I really think that if he is treating you that way you shouldn't be with him. It sounds almost like he only pays attention to you in bed and that's not right. Pluck up your courage and talk to him and if he doesn't agree or stop seeing those other girls.... dump him. He's not worth it. Maybe after you dump him he'll change..but if he doesn't, find you self someone better. NO ONE should put up with that kind of stuff. Maybe you should try marriage coucleing

Mic_is28

I met the man of my dreams at eharmony.com I was a single mom of an 8 yr old son. You should try it but you have to be completly honest. Remember your worth more than being considered someone's occasional side dish. Go to counseling get your selfworth back. My grandma always said if he'll cheat with you on his wife, then he'll cheat on you as well. Once a cheater always a cheater. Have enough love for yourself to walk away and get what you deserve. Life to short to waste on people that don't respect you.

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