Cari
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I know you're simply asking for financial advice and nothing further, but I can't resist commenting. My brother is 26 and still lives at home with my mother. He pays rent, but it's a minimal sum considering that my mother pays all bills and provides food. She thinks she is being kind and supportive, but my take on the situation is that she's actually raising him in a way which means that he doesn't know how to live in the real world. If anything happened to my mum so my brother had to fend for himself, he would not have the first clue about how to budget, and he wouldn't know how to actually run a house such as paying council tax and choosing utilities suppliers. What it comes down to is this: both my mum and you are not doing their children any favours. You've raised an adult who doesn't know how to survive in the real world. But in your case it's even worse - there's no way that you should be paying for cigarettes, transportation costs and so on - at least my mother doesn't do this.
It's advised that people's rent costs should be about one third of their income. I would say that £300 per month is most definitely fair when you're paying bills and food. If you feel that this is harsh, then drop it to £250, but I wouldn't go lower than that.
You also need to tell him that all other handouts stop. Tell him that for £250 or £300, he gets:
- A roof over his head
- All bills paid
- Breakfast and dinner (and lunch at the weekend) should he be home and choose to eat with the family. But the refrigerator is not a bottomless pit that he can help himself to at any time that he chooses.
What he doesn't get is:
- Help with any other costs, such as transportation or cigarettes |
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Timothy S
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He's 26? Why is he still at home? |
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mat118
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about £899.99 a month. |
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Lucky Man 2
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I left at 16, kick him out the door and tell him to get on with it. |
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Prodigal Son
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I think your son should be paying at least £200 per month,
He'll never stand on his own two feet until you make him do so.
Thank you :)
I've had my house since I was 16,
And the trials and tribulations have shaped who I am. |
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ISH
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Other people have commented on the rent appropriate, but I do have a few suggestions.
Phone: get him to make all his calls from his mobile. If he needs a landline, install a second line (at his expense) and then he can pay the bill on that.
Bus fares: Why can't he buy a monthly bus pass on pay day? If he won't do that let him walk.
Cigarettes: Tell him to buy his own or go without.
Lunch: He can either make himself a packed lunch or budget so he can afford it himself.
You are neither helping him or yourself by allowing a 26 year old to act like a spoilt teen. |
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lost
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make him pay 200.00 a month and get another job or go back to school My son wouldnt pay it so now he pays it to someone else he moved out. |
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Pinky and THE BRAIN
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I pay £270 a month and feed myself
It's called paying your way people and having a little insight into the real world when you leave home, thats why. Why should parents look after you when you're earning enough to pay your way? they did that enough until you're an adult! |
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Foxhound Solid
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Seriously
£200.00 a month and he should provide his own food, toiletries etc etc etc
i did but got my own place with my buddies now and its ace!!! |
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Michael P
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I paid 30% of my wages and had to live by the rules of the house (turn off lights, respect others, etc) and if I ran out of cash before pay day I was cheaper to get a loan off the bank than it was to borrow off my parents!!! |
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bubble_rose_fairy
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I think £200 a month is fair however i would put my foot down over the phone bill, lights, food and defiantly cigarettes and money for fares to work, i know it's harsh but he needs to learn at 26 that he has certain responsibilities. He knows where he bread is buttered and taking advantage of you as a parent. |
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Schuutz
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I paid my mum £250.00 per month until I moved out of home at the age of 25.
If he doesn't pay you any rent, don't do anything for him. Don't make his meals, do his washing/ironing, buy food for him, don't let him have his own key.
He'll soon get the message. |
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ray ray
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I would say that 200 is a reasonable amount to request each month especially if he is not paying bills and is buying is own food. However if he isn't then 250 is a fairer rate, although he must know that this rent would not reflect what he would have to pay if he was out on his own |
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vectramanvxr
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£80 per week i pay |
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LILLY J
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both me and my brother had to pay £200 a month.
our parents let us live rent free while in school and university but as soon as we got a full time job it was £200 a month. |
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leonardhomes@sbcglobal.net
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200.00 a month and charge him on the excess phone bill.
If he runs out of money tell him no money from you, and stick to it. He will learn fast that way. It was the best thing I did for my son, and now he is very responsible |
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beverley.newman1@btinternet.com
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I made my children pay a third of their take home pay every week.That left them with a third to save and a third to spend.I did not give them anything other than a home,food and washing for them.They learned the value of money and that you do'nt get anything for nothing!As for paying his bus fares and buying cigarettes.you are mad,you are not teaching him anything useful and are out of pocket yourself. |
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funlovincriminal08
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Mw & my bro both pay £100 per month each.
This includes all food & washing. |
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toomb94
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Well, that all depends how much you pay, add up things like how much it costs you to feed him and stuff :D
Good luck! my brother wont even pay my mum :P |
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Sky
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Where does all his money go then as you seem to be paying everything for him. I was living with my parents aged 26 & they were very generous and didn't ask for any rent. However, I helped around the house, paid for and cooked my own food, paid for my travel expenses to and from work, did my own laundry etc. I think you are paying too much for him, you shouldn't be buying his cigarettes and bus tickets. He should pay for his own things, and should also learn to save money as he is living with you so is in the ideal situation to do that. If you are asking for money from him, maybe £250 per month as it still isn't much for all he is getting. |
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SELB
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Stay in a hotel for a night. Then multiply the bill by seven to get a weeks rent. |
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jackie m
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I earn £680 per month and I have to run a house by paying rent council tax etc.....Can I move in with you and ill give you £30 per week, I don't eat a lot and out working all day? My niece pays £200 per month. |
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photoguy_nate
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Its probably best to talk to them about it. There is no magical property value associated with living with your family. It will take a compromise to arrive at a fair number, as it depends on freedoms, responsibilities, etc.
It can't be compared to normal rent, as there are certain freedoms that go along with it being your own place, that aren't awarded in someone elses place.
If you want them to move out, propose a high number and sitck to it, if you want them to stay, its best to be fair. |
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londonboy90102
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if hes 26 i say 200 a month |
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julie g
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It looks like he is too comfortable at home that's why he's still there at 26!
My Mum used to make me pay 1/4 of my take home pay for dig money, so I'd say about the £200 mark is fair but maybe he should be doing his own washing etc. |
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SAC
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The I paid my parents 25% of net while I lived with them (and was working).
That seemed fair. It was less than having to move out but enough to make me appreciate that you can't live for free.
It was easier to base it on a proportion of income to allow for differences from overtime, etc. |
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simplesimon
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You could get an indication of rental prices in your area from somewhere like www.rightmove.co.uk - but they don't take into account bills, council tax, and food and drink - which he clearly takes advantage of.
Assuming there are three of you: work out what a third of your mortgage repayments are, plus a third of all the bills and council tax, plus third of average food bills - and present him with that as the alternative to moving out! It's what he is using, so its fair!
I don't know any 26 year olds that still live with their parents... If the impetus to move out hasn't kicked in yet, it may never do if he is allowed to take liberties. Perhaps faced with a hard decision he might look to move out, and on in life - £900 a month (pre or post tax) is well below the national average! |
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Lee H
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You're not doing him any favours.
£900 a month sounds like quite a very fair rent for the hotel you're providing. Give him some pocket money to spend on sweets and pop and he should be fine.
On a serious note: assuming there are three of you, one third of the household bills (services and food) and whatever the local rate for a room in a house is, look in the local paper for an idea of this (don't sell yourself short!). Charge whatever you feel your time is worth for the bits and pieces you do on his behalf, give him the option to start pulling his weight? Phone bill should be itemised, get hm to pay his way - he is taking advantage of you!
If you feel bad about taking this money from him, maybe put some aside from each payment towards a rental deposit for him to move out? |
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Tray
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I would make him pay $400 a month. You are paying for EVERYTHING for him. Food, Cigs, bus fair, all the utilities everything. $400 a month is cheap when you take all of that into consideration!!! Man I wish I had a mom like you lol
If you make him pay $400 a month hopefully it will teach him responsibility and money management. Obviously since he's blowing threw your money he doesn't have any of that right now. By you helping him it will only hurt him in the long run. Even if you wanted to take the $400 a month and set it aside it will create a little nest egg for him once he moves out. Good Luck |
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chopsyturvy
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i'm 27 and i pay my parents £200 per month. Their mortgage is about £800 pm. My rent includes all bills etc and i feel it is a fair amount :) |
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Cory Anderson III
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If its your son then a fair rent is £0, I never understand why parents would charge their kids unless they really need the mney, then I would say £30 a week? |
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