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KTL | What is the difference between putting me on my to-be husbands mortgage or leaving me the house in a will? |
My future husband suggested in lieu of adding me to the mortgage of the house in which we have been living in for 2 years,(he bought it himself right before we met) that we make our wills after we get married and arrange for me to get the house if anything were to happen to him. I guess Im not sure what the difference is and wasnt sure if this should be taken as an insult to me? We originally agreed to adding me on the mortgage, then he recently suggested the will. The will would prevent the house from going to anyone else, but wouldnt my name on the mortgage do the same?(I have great credit and great job) I feel if Im contributing to the mortgage my name should be on it. He now understands that and it is probably what we will do, but are there pros and cons either way, with just my name on the mortgage, or just having it left to me in a living will? |
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cindra
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This is an insult! A will can be changed any time without your knowledge. At this point, what your boyfriend is suggesting is that you're only good enough to pay for HIS house, but not good enough to have your name on the property. In the event of divorce, if your name isn't on the property, he will GET ALL!! This is a very slippery and manipulative way of f giving you nothing and keeping all. Your name should be on the DEED, not the mortgage!!!! You should have the following put on the deed before (Note: I said BEFORE you get married): JOINT TENANTS WITH FULL RIGHTS OF SURVIVORSHIP" This statement means that you jointly own the home and upon death, you would have full-ownership. Once again, I'm warning you---the will can be changed at random, at the first fight the two of you have, plus you have no guarantee that he would make a will or keep it after the fact. The fact that you have been paying his house for the past 2 years is one of the biggest and dummest mistakes that women do---next to shacking up with a guy! I would not enter into a marriage without doing this. If he balks at the idea, pack your bags. |
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Ralph N
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get your name on the deed. |
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anniewog
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You just need to get on the deed. If you are paying for some of this house you want to be on the deed. Because what could happen lets say worse case is that you two end up in a divorce he will get the house because you are not on the deed. So if you have no reason to refi ask your local title company about being quit claimed on the deed. And if he knows what he is talking about I would take as an insult because he is protecting himself. |
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Gizmo
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The difference is that if you were to get divorced, you would have no rights to the home or any of the equity in it whether or not you pay part of the mortgage. The second responder is correct however. You can not simply "add" your name to the mortgage. You would need to refinance or have him sign a quit claim deed. |
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mattman 6
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I wouldn't take it as an insult. I think that it is not a bad idea. Although you should never go into a marriage thinking in case of a divorce on anything, it would help in that case. It will be much easier for you to leave a house that is not in your name. Also if he were to die you would get the house. So if the marriage lasts a lifetime you get what you put into it. I think it is a good option to you. |
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Landlord
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His idea is good and less expensive then changing the mortgage.
However, get yourself on the deed, otherwise it will harder to get your half when you divorce. |
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darwical
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If the house is left to you in his will, there is nothing from stopping him from changing his will in the future and not telling you about it. I would not settle for anything less than your name on the deed. Otherwise the house is still his to do what he wants. He could aslo sell the house without your permission. I know we like to think that marriage is forever, and nothing like that would ever happen -but its probably a good time to be realistic, and not take chances. He may be thinking the same thing, and thats why he is having second thoughts about putting your name on the deed. |
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Beverly S
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You can't be added to the mortgage loan with out refinancing it. However, he can add you to the property with a Quit Claim deed. But the loan papers that he signed already are done- you can't change them. |
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Daisy
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The difference is PROPERTY RIGHTS in the event of a divorce. If he owned it before marriage, but adds you to the deed after you marry, it automatically becomes 1/2 yours, no ifs ands or buts. If he doesn't add you, then you have to fight for your claim to the property in the event of a divorce, and most likely you will loose. Its called Dower Rights. Women have them in most states, men do not. And its not adding you to the MORTGAGE that is important, it is adding your name to the TITLE or DEED of the property that is. If he leaves it to you in a will, there is no guarantee that you will inherit, especially if he has an ex-wife with any kind of property settlement that you don't know about. Because then you are caught in 'prior claims' type stuff. Adding your name to the mortgage only results in obligating you to the Debt, it does not add your name to property rights. If he is suggesting the will, it is because he has thought about what will happen if you do split up, and he wants to make sure that what is his (real estate) stays his. The only valid claim you will have for half the home (or half its value) is if your name is added to the deed/title as his wife. Joint ownership means joint division in a divorce case.
Personally, I would demand to be added to the title, but left off the mortgage, because that would ensure you own half the property, but are not obligated to the debt in the event of foreclosure! Read up on the divorce laws in your state, and on the property laws-sounds like your man already did! |
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