cross_sox
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it sounds like you are working all hours and days so that you have no time alone to think or grieve. you need to take a small step back look at what you are doing to yourself. you know you cannot carry on as you are or you would not have asked the question. you have the casual labour and help from her family, i am sure they will understand your need to rest a little, they are probably worried about you working all hours but maybe don't like to say anything in case you get offended or upset.
take a little time for yourself and good luck |
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jayteaches
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I am so sorry to hear about your loss.
It is very brave of you to speak openly about it at such an early stage in the grieving process.
Working like you are is probably your way of coping with the grief and trying to get some normality back into your life.
When my son died four years ago, I carried on with the college course I was doing, and in a way that helped to keep me sane.
However, there are various stages of grieving to go through, and it can be exhausting, because you are trying to hold in your emotions and that is tiring stuff.
At some point, it would be a good idea to have some rest and at this point you will need some help.
Try contacting your local Cruse Bereavement Counselling Services - I found them very helpful and supportive, and they helped me begin to come to terms with some of my grief - although it still continues. You should be able to find them in your telephone book, or the Yellow Pages - I will look them up for you at the end. I can recommend them.
Can you talk to her family about what has happened?
Have you got any friends you can talk to about it? It does help to b e able to talk about it, but we don't always want to. Be guided by your own instincts - there are no 'rules'.
Well I hope this helps and God Bless:>)
Try: http://www.crusebereavementcare.org.uk/
they should be able to put you int touch with your local centre - they come to your home if you wish. |
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Automation Wizard
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It's time to look into hireing an employee or if absolutely necessary finding a new partner. |
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tiger_lilly33186
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Whatever keeps you going. As long as you are not neglecting your own basic needs, just keep doing what you are doing.
I had the same experience with my first husband. He died while I was one month pregnant, so all I could do was sleep to keep from thinking too much about it. |
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DooDooBrown
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I feel greatly for you...If the business is your passion then keep going...otherwise cut your losses or cash in and get out |
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Mickenoss
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Get an apprentice or trainee, take the strain off and take some time out. sorry about your loss |
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zara c
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Not really, if you are working 7 days a week and relying on family members you are not formulating your team correctly. Mostly because you don't have a team, you need to spend the money on a really good manager, worth their weight in gold.
In saying that, without knowing what business you're in I cannot help. |
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Frank Woods
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I wish you said what sort of business it is. I have been doing family business all my life and I am thee last one running it, with my mother celebrating her 90th birthday this week. My parents started it in 1950. It is a fruit and veg business and I supply the best hotels and restaurants in and around Dublin city, Ireland. My brother died from cancer 8 yrs ago and that left me very much alone running the business.
I really must tell about two home businesses I got involved in since, and while I do them both as a side line, I find them a great source of both a distraction from everyday living and a source of income as well. They can be checked on www.aloedistributor.com and www.fuelxfrank.myffi.biz If you wish you can email me at frankwoodsflp@eircom.net I will be happy to support you in your latest bereavement. God bless you and please look after yourself. Frank from Ireland. |
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cofused
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Maybe you are at the moment.
It is something you started together so you you probably need to do this while you work through your grief. But sooner or later you will have to face the outside world without your partner.
Good Luck |
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shirley_corsini
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I'm not sure what you mean by casual labor. Get some good, dependable help. You can't do it all yourself and have no time left to take care of you.
At the very least, set aside some specific times during your week when no work is allowed. You need me time or you will go crazy and your business will suffer anyway. I wish you were in my home town. I need a job and you need some help. |
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acfords
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wat business is it?- can't u train sum1. |
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Hagar
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Consider it a short-term solution, but quickly build in a more sustainable plan and communicate it to her family (it's a good gesture to involve them in devising a lasting labour-solution; this enables them to appreciate your efforts and the realities of the challenges). Also consider selling if the emotional equity is too great, make a fresh start much later. |
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credible_bulk
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Something's gotta give. You may need to take time off to heal from the loss. |
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Lily
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Your partner wouldn't have wanted you to work like this. Can't you employ a manager to do the day to day stuff? You can get back to doing something more enjoyable, and building the business up a bit. |
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mrscmmckim
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If you are questioning it, there has to be a good reason. I suggest grief counseling and a group business meeting with these casual laborers and her family to weed out the issues. |
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sjconline
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If you can keep it up and somehow train someone else to share in those responsibilities, then you could step down a little. Look for another partner in the business (maybe another family member) but be sure you have a formal partnership in place (not some handshake deal) because if things go south and you want to sell the business or need to fire some family, it could get really ugly.
Good luck! : ) |
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monkeyballs
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Couldnt you sell the business and start afresh? |
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bmwdriver11
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well, it depends. Running a small business does take a lot of time, and 7 days a week wouldnt suprise me a whole lot. But if you are doing it to the exclusion of everything else, then you might be trying to get away from your grief in working all the time. Maybe you should go speak with a psychologist if that is the case. |
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letem haveit
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Apparently, you had time to stop and ask this question. Maybe it's not that bad really? I think you already know the answer to your question. If it was so wrong, you'd have changed something by now. |
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want2flybye
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If it's working for you and keeps you from being consumed with grief then YES! The bonus that your loving and working with her family is a tribute to your beloved, do what you need to do to get you through the rough spots but give yourself some sanctuary and restful peace. The thing about the past is to accept the things we can not change, change the things we can or need to change and ask the BIG GUY for his mercy, wisdom and compassion to know the difference. God bless you, I know that you most certainly deserve it! Best to you and your family! Live to fight another day! |
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M J H
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Sounds like you need to get someone else to work along side you and take some of the strain. Whilst you may just about be able to manage 7 days a week at the moment, long term it's no good, and surely you have other things you'd like to do occasionally?! Get someone else to help if at all possible. |
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dodds
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Well I think I would be the same are you doing this rather than facing up to thing? Sorry to her about your Wifex |
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UKnowUWantMe
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if it is what you want to do then yes. if not then let go. i know it may be hard because it's something you did together but if its not what you want anymore then its time to change. |
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digital genius
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life does not equal work.
take some time off. normal bus. hours all of that.
close for sundays...
otherwise,,, you can work yourself to death. life is meant to be enjoyed. |
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rjsheri
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get a new partner |
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rlwnation
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,Only you can answer that dose if feel right to you? All vows are until death do you part, so now it's up to you to decide what's right for you, you will definitely harvest the rewards of all your labor. |
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